i'm feeling overwhelmed..
and more often than not.. i'm feeling like i want to lead a slower existence.
i want to clean my house of clutter.
i want to make my house my own.
i want to stop thining. all. the. time.
about what i should be doing.
i want to learn how to garden.
i want to learn to play chess.
i want to take a self defense class.
i want to make the short journal film i've been talking about.
i want to buy a laptop.
i want to stop caring what others think.
i want to dance.
sing.
i want to love my body.
i want to make a painting with my menstral blood.

i don't know if i should move to san francisco.

i'm thinking more and more that i've got some stuff to figure out here.
i've got to build up.

yes. it is taking me a long time.
fuck you.

i want to be a goddess.
i want someone who will see me as a goddess.

i want a girlfriend.
but not just any girlfriend.



i guess i just really don't care anymore.