modest mouse.

listening to modest mouse and cleaning my bedroom.
throwing stuff out.
i've realized that it doesn't matter as long as you are doing the best you can in this moment.
and whatever you are doing the best is where your life will lead.
i guess...
"and i miss you when you're around."
deep down...
sometimes it comes back.
sometimes i realize that i'm still in love with you.
but it's better this time around.
because i do love you.
and want the best for you.
and want you to go go go
if that's what you want.
and i hope i know you forever.
for i feel my life is about to take flight.
and you know, sometimes this shit takes a really long time.
a really fucking long time.

i have an intake with the victims of violence program in somerville next monday.
how will it go?
not sure....i'm scared.
i'm scared to face this shit...
and i hate that i have to keep admitting it..
admitting it admitting it.
homo queer
someone please help me i like girls.
and i wish i didn't and i don't know why.....
internalized homophobia?

"have i told ya, have i told ya? that you could really get it on ..."

i'm gonna head into work today when i get this crapola done.
got to buy some books too.
drop off mike d's hat at the cleaners.



















have i told ya?



















i really think i'm doing quite better lately.